Slimy White Knobby Pac-Men with Teeth

A steampunk Delicatessen resistance dream (haven’t had one of these in awhile!).

An oppressive organization of squat, evil steampunk bureaucrats ran an underground arcade. It looked like the inside of a sub: decorated with lots of fat, riveted pipe-fittings and thick portal windows, none of which actually opened on the outdoors. They did have some artificial sunlight fluorescents. They also had miniature sentient robots and these horrible bio-omniphages that were like slimy white knobby pac-men with teeth, which they used to power their most terrifying weapon, a twenty foot tall black rubber tyrannosaur torso and head glued onto the end of a bus. The head was mobile, quite agile, and literally capable of eating metal.

I belonged to a small underground resistance group. We had made considerable headway against the bureaucrats by cannibalizing their own technology, to the point that we had begun infiltrating their ranks with tiny robot spies and had assembled a giant bruiser of an attack SUV, heavily armored, with a battering ram and anti-personnel devices. Our goal was to exploit a limited form of interplanar portal technology we had discovered (mostly used by the bureaucrats as part of arcade games) to assassinate their leader, the devious Professor.

Unfortunately, we were discovered. It turned out the bureaucrats had a tiny robot spy of their own. They raided our lair. We barely escaped to the SUV with our lives and led the tyrannobus on a merry chase across the desert wastes mad max style, smashing up underlings and robots and wreaking havoc among their infrastructure in the process. But finally the tyrannobus caught the SUV in its jaws. We hit it with everything we had, ripping open the rubber body and revealing the creepy omnivoracious pac man maggots which spilled out over everything, ate through the SUV’s armor like jello and would have eaten us if we hadn’t scrambled out of our protective suits and scattered on foot.

One by one, my allies were captured and taken before the Professor to be interrogated. I, meanwhile, managed to make my way back to the safe house where we’d stored the limited portal device. Activating it, I was able to watch as the Professor, from his laboratory command center, orchestrated the capture of my allies. I readied the projectile weapon we had assembled from scrap (which resembled an ancient matchlock rifle that fired empty shell casings) and pulled the trigger–but it didn’t go off. This alerted the Professor to my presence. He was laughing at me and monologuing, working to shut down the portal as I struggled to repair my weapon, when I woke up.

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